I don't know how many more days will be drowned
 in tears before I can let you go
And how many sleepless nights pass
waiting for the clock to strike 6 in the morning
My heart attuned to the timing of your arrival
And I am writing this in the hope that it will cure me
As spells to exorcise all that I have loved and lost
You most of all
Like the pain of countries partitioned,
Torn apart and bloodied
You and I,
Now just You
 and I
Separately
without being held by each other
untangled limbs
I worry about you
Still
Even though I have no claim on you
Love, like other habits, die hard.

A prayer for you

My mother told me to not give my heart so young

That I wasn't like the other young ladies

 I grew up with in school

That I was supposed to achieve a lot more

How was I to know I would find you

And that you would take my hand

And show me a whole new world?

But now that I have lost you

 By my own undoing

 I want you to heal

And even though I am no longer yours

I want to help you

Somehow anyhow with words

 With silence, even in my absence

I want you to have the best the world can offer

I want you to have the rains that you love,

And the little things that make you happy

I hope you can find solace in them,

In your movies and your music

I don't have anything else to offer you

Except a prayer for you.

You are your own person now

You belong to no one

Untangled from another person. 

Brutally. Glass shatteringly.

Breathe. Cry a little less.

Can you do that for me?please?

I know how much it hurts,

How it was never meant to be this way

And how can you possibly un-love someone?

But things are they way they are

The sooner you accept it the better 

You want to learn how to forget 

Is that it?

You want to wipe it clean 

All the memories, especially the good ones 

Because they hit you so hard

At how perfect it once was 

Because there are so many things that I couldn't say
When I should have
Such as it never happened that day
Even though you found so many witnesses for it
Such as I let you make so many assumptions
Because I knew I had lost you
And it didn't make sense anymore to clarify
Every single poem was about you
So please don't take that away from me
That I really wanted my whole life with you
Till you brushed me away
That I will always always love you
In the most intensely overwhelmingly insane way
It starts and ends with a cigarette like you said
And all of it,all of us ends in rain.

What would I do without you?

Everything reminds me of you
I never knew it took so much effort to breathe without you,
Waking up and not finding you beside me
Even years from now, if I walked through the college gates
I would always think of you walking me back,
Not running for classes, not the friends I made
You are there in everything that breathes,
Like the wind breaking at my window last night
To which I laid awake whole night listening to because I couldn't sleep
Because I had ripped out my own heart it seems
One recent scene emerges
Your eyes are closed and the wind is falling on your face
We are matched in white, the world brushes past us
It moves me
To have you
To have you holding me
Like dying thoughts
There is so much to wish for
What would I do without you?

excerpts

........I opened the cover and saw that he had written in a beautiful cursive handwriting “ To M, By now I have become more you and you more I. Always, K” . I was surprised to find no “sorry” or no “love” mentioned anywhere, having always associated romance to have been bound only by those words.I was discovering new terms of romance, of loving and being loved, of loving while hating, of loving even after it was all over, of love that faded and love that remained, of love that we carry with us throughout our loves. By now, I have become more you and you more I.

You have settled into yourself

You have settled into yourself
Wrapped yourself in bones and skin
You emerge with tremulous eyes, as though on the edge of tears
and a beautiful mouth unsure of speech
To never be anyone else
Confined to the childhood that is yours,
love that is yours, loss that is yours
Have you ever seen a body, wrapped in worn-out shawls ,
rushing past in the pavement
and felt a twinge in your heart
of a life that you narrowly missed possessing?
And to love someone, like I love you,
 So specifically, How does that work?
Would I not love you if you shed your skin and bones,
and all the debris of your mind,
all the things that you said
and all the songs that you sang?