Tuesday, December 22, 2015

In the seven months till she saw him again

In the seven months till she saw him again,
 Meira had  turned 16, felt desperate to see him again,
 concocted stories in her head about his life,
 tried to innocently ask her mother about him
 to which she wasn’t very helpful apart from
 the obvious fact that he was in her MA class and a bright boy,
 tried to forget him because he had never come back 
to return more books of her mother's, figured out that
 he probably saw her as his proffessor’s daughter and nothing more,
 had her first kiss with a boy in her school who she felt
 was much prettier than her, then told him very guiltily 
that the kiss didn’t mean they were going out as he might
have assumed, devoured dozens of books, decided that life
 was meaningless and inherently unfair, castigated the books
 she read for making her see, think and feel more than 
was necessary for survival, sobbed a few nights into her
 pillow as she felt an acute pain in her heart at all the beauty 
and all the stupidity, punched a boy in school for calling 
her ‘chinki’, had been summoned to the principal’s office
 for her aggressive behaviour which had surprised everyone
 because she had been such a wonderful student, 
had always done well in school and hadn’t exhibited 
any antisocial behaviour till now, tried to bring up the fact 
that the boy had provoked her by using a derogatory term, 
her mother had been summoned, Naina was indignant that 
her daughter had to suffer because of a stupid ignorant boy,
 had fought on her daughter’s behalf but decided to brush up
 the matter because she didn’t want her daughter to be awarded
 a disciplinary action, Meira had cried her heart out
 on the way back, Naina had felt helpless and heartbroken
 that despite all that she had done to bring her up in what
 she had considered fair, never letting her daughter feel 
any less of a person because she was a girl, she had completely 
overlooked the fact that she looked different from her, 
different from the people who inhabited this part of the country,
 who called her awful names, and thought she was any less 
beautiful because of that. For the first time in her life, 
Naina wondered if she had done the right thing
 by leaving Manipur and bringing Meira here. 

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